Alex is Up North!

My umm...alarm didn't go off...

2011-06-19T10:35:00.005-06:00

Oh, hi there everyone. Sorry I'm late. Now I know some of you "dislikers" (to be a "hater" is a bit strong choice of word isn't it?) are going to want to focus on how inconsistent I am, and perhaps be wondering if I have some crazy reason(s) for my absence. Welllllllllllllll no. None of that. And for the record...IRL...I'm the king of consistency. I am a rock of reliability. No wait, I am THE

Baby go bar?

2011-02-18T12:00:00.000-07:00

Here's something I came across a few days ago and I've been noticing it has got a bit of recognition across the interwebs as of late. If anyone knows what the nature of my work is then they may be slightly surprised that I find this video so hilarious...but watch it yourself and I think you'll agree that it's AT LEAST chortle worthy (or perhaps a "titter" if that's more your style?):That being

I AM A BANANA

2011-02-17T21:54:00.006-07:00

Continuing with my theme of fitness/health related posts, I'd like to encourage everyone who feels that behaviours can be shaped through tax policies to take in the following. It's a link to an initiative for the creation of an Adult Fitness Tax Credit, much like the already in existence Child Fitness Tax Credit. If you have a minute, take a look and submit an e-postcard to your local MP:Adult

Oh...you're "that" guy

2011-02-15T19:37:00.002-07:00

So after much biatchin' on my part, I've started trying to do something about all my aches and pains. So you mean you've cut alcohol, candy, and deep fried foods out of your diet?Huh? Wuh? Good god no. I'm taking more pills and powders of course! Let's see...I've got Vitamin D, Glucosamine, multivitamin, Omega 3/6/9, glutamine, Bailey's (I keed I keed!), creatine, and whey isolate protein. Phew

Getting from point A to point B just got a whole lot sexier...

2011-02-13T09:34:00.000-07:00

RAWR!I'm not sure if this really qualifies as "something new" anymore or not...but almost 2 months ago I made the hard/difficult/trivial/EASY decision of putting my old truck out to pasture (you do know that means KILLING IT don't you?? Sorry to ruin your childhood.) by utilizing Ford's Recycle Your Ride program. I was a hardcore believer in the notion that I had no use for fancy options such as

The New and Old Adventures of Alexander B.

2011-02-12T13:09:00.006-07:00

Alexander B., Took a pee,In the northwestern sea, Indubidibleeeeeheeheeeheeeeeeeee!MOMMMMM! HE SAID IT AGAIN!!!!! YEAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGG!Ah...childhood memories.Hello again internet world. Or, more specifically, fellow bloggers.My it has been a while since we've been in touch. Too long? Or not long enough some may say? Some. Some jerks may say that.Well let me get us started again in

4 wheels bad...2 legs good!

2010-11-21T22:57:00.003-07:00

I know I know, imagine that, it got cold in the Northwest Territories in the winter! Blah blah, the presses, stop them, etc...BUTThis is actually a cold snap of sorts. Weather Canada even told me so! (the added an adorable asterisk beside the weather this morning...so nyeaaah)There's been some biatchin' around the island from people about it finally getting cold cold, but I gotta say, so far it

New laptops = Life is great!

2010-11-19T23:54:00.002-07:00

I can't really justify the purchase of my new laptop (besides pure unadulterated raw gaming bliss which I may have or have not received in the mail on Friday) but this weekend is gonna be AWESOME.Lemme 'splain it for you:-Badminton-Skating-Community Bazaar-Snowshoeing-Massive community dog walk (more to come)-UFC watching (don't hate on me)-Did I mention that I purchased a NEW LAPTOP?!?!?! (ASUS

Did that ceiling tile just change its pattern? Cause if it did...

2010-11-16T20:26:00.004-07:00

In case anyone was wondering how I came to be sharing my love for Girl Talk earlier today...during work hours...I have a confession to make:I had food poisoning today!Now before you throw your arms up in a celebratory manner, I should inform you that this was the kind of food poisoning that was not enjoyable. I KNOW RIGHT!?!??So besides listening to some music, running to the bathroom to do

Anytime Eric Clapton and Biggie Smalls get together, you just know it's gonna be a good time

2010-11-16T13:32:00.004-07:00

I don't know that I share musical tastes with many of my blog readers (and by readers I of course mean all 3 of you...and my Mom. Thanks Mom.), but I simply must share this musical deal.Girl Talk (aka Gregg Michael Gillis) is a DJ (and a former tissue engineer of all things) who is known for his creative sample-mashups of modern pop/hip hop with classic rock and pop tunes from yesteryear. There's

You wouldn't like me when I'm......JUDGMENTAL

2010-11-12T07:12:00.000-07:00

In keeping with my theory that you never know what a day in the North will bring you, yesterday I was asked to act as a judge for a youth poster contest for Nation Aboriginal Addictions Awareness Week (aka the longest name for an awareness initiative ever). Of course I can't yet provide you with details about who the winners are as they results haven't been announced (can you imagine the

Thank You

2010-11-11T20:25:00.001-07:00

In Flanders fields the poppies blowBetween the crosses, row on row,That mark our place; and in the skyThe larks, still bravely singing, flyScarce heard amid the guns below.We are the Dead. Short days agoWe lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,Loved and were loved, and now we lie,In Flanders fields.Take up our quarrel with the foe:To you from failing hands we throwThe torch; be yours to hold it

Swallow that food...

2010-11-09T07:30:00.000-07:00

It's that time of the year again everybody!GIMME THAT FACIAL HAIR BAYBEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE:It's now 9 days into Movember and things are only getting started. So far we've got a group of about 15-20 guys in Fort Simpson who have donated their faces and are sporting a mo' for the month. Last year's campaign ended with an awesome party and we raised about $3500 towards prostate cancer research.So if

Answer: $35

2010-11-08T20:37:00.003-07:00

Question: Hi, I need to buy a 4-pack of AAA batteries and now that I think about it, I want to pick up a 6 pack of beer...how much do you think that'll run me?High prices are obviously (I mean come onnnnn) nothing new to me, I know by now it's just something you deal with living north of 60. But every once in a while I'll go to purchase something in Simpson and I get a rampant case of diarr-uhh

The Mackenzie River's neglected brother...the Mackenzie Riverbank

2010-11-07T09:35:00.005-07:00

The weather has been b-e-a-uuuutiful all weekend here, with a surprising Chinook kicking off the weekend with +8C temperatures. Speaking of Chinooks...Wikipedia has a good read on them HERE. Maybe all that stuff is common knowledge to all you westerners (oh how I loathe you) but for a small town east coast bluenoser who don't know nothin' 'bout no nothin'...Chinooks are still a pretty neat

In lieu of an actual update...

2010-11-06T09:02:00.002-06:00

Watch this! (and pretend I had something to do with it. I swear I contribute to society...errr....in...ummm...theory.)Lots of updates to come! No SRSLY!!(again, this is a theoretical statement...so forget all about your existing mental constructs of "time")

I may be in the minority...

2010-10-17T22:12:00.005-06:00

I had a post that I wrote earlier last week that I thought I had published but apparently I switched the publish dates on it and it never went up...Anywho, the post was a spitting rant on how displeased (you wouldn't like me when I'm....DISPLEASED!) I had been with the weather and pretty much life in general. It had been raining of and on, the dogs were pissed, and every single one of my

Canada Post and I are friends again...for now.

2010-10-03T21:57:00.005-06:00

As per normal, I have an ongoing love/hate relationship with Canada Post and the entire mail system in general.I order something, I track its progress across the country fanatically, and then it gets to Edmonton and I'm left in a stage of undefined anticipation...am I going to get my package anytime soon? Am I going to have to follow up with Canada Post to see if my package was lost? I NEED TO

Moose bumps (and other parts of the moose anatomy)

2010-10-02T16:11:00.004-06:00

Let me set the mood for you before we get started:The fall season is a very important time of year for many residents in the NWT as it brings about...Fall Hunt!If you're a big fan of intact moose, or not a big fan of moose that aren't intact...you may want to look away. As for everyone else...yeeeeehawwwwww! You're my kind of people:Behold the moose...nature's jokesters, even in death:Nom nom nom

I don't have a plaid problem...YOU have a plaid problem!

2010-09-28T19:21:00.003-06:00

Ok wait nevermind, yeah I do have a plaid problem:umm....I have no excuse. Strange but True Alex Fact: The jacket in the top right hand corner of the picture was purchased at the Dawson City Home Hardware by Alex for $18! Alex...a good shopper or a GREAT shopper? We both know the answer to that. Alex...likes talking in 3rd person or LOVES talking in 3rd person? Alex says the latter. Alex says

6 days down....8 to go.

2010-09-21T20:57:00.005-06:00

Today is D-Day...plus 6! Wuh? Oh...no not that D-Day, I'm referring to De-balling Day of course! (too soon?)In a matter of minutes, Thomas Jefferson (aka TJ) went from a beast of a dog, overflowing with energy and testosterone...to....uhhh a beast of a dog, temporarily NOT overflowing with energy and now with a very manageable amount of testosterone.With the traveling vet here it's not exactly

Terry Fox kicked my ass

2010-09-19T20:49:00.004-06:00

I love doing the Terry Fox Run. LOVE IT.Unfortunately it's not because I have a strong passion to raise funds for cancer research. (what...I'm just being honest! I'm FOR curing cancer...for the record)Nobody will ever accuse me of being TOO motivated...and if someone does I'll show them! I'll get together a bunch of....ah frig it I'll do it later...I do love a challenge though. I do my best when

Northern Lite-Brites

2010-09-14T12:36:00.003-06:00

The nights have gotten cold, the days getting short...is this reason for panic!? Nope! It's the signal of my tied-for-first favourite season (tied with spring, summer, and fall. What? I don't play favourites with seasons, and neither should you.).....winter! Okay well I guess technically it signals fall...but uhh...shut up you.The northern lights have been out somewhat consistently over the past

Music is my friend

2010-09-09T07:59:00.000-06:00

Soooooooooooooo I like music. There it is! It's out there! In fact...I LOVE music. LOVE IT!Except I find that people tend to take exception to my tastes in music. I like it all. Well...almost all of it. Not the stuff you like. Gross.For you see...I'm one of those people. Yeaaaah one of those people. The guy that always is playing music you've never heard of. Hell you've never even heard of that

Internetting is serious business

2010-09-08T07:07:00.000-06:00

I think I might be in a internet rut. There's a few different sites I stay up on but other than that I don't stray too far from those bookmarks.It's funny though (HAHA), because when I have complete and reliable access to the internet (ie. At home, not at work. And when NorthwestTel decides to play nice, which can be rare), I get bored pretty quick. Here's a few of the sites I regularly kill

For your information...

2010-09-07T22:42:00.004-06:00

The bane of my existence (for today anyway)

2010-09-06T14:58:00.003-06:00

Keeping an award-winning yard isn't something my roommate and I really pride ourselves on. I don't think either of us really mind doing manual labour at all; hell Mike is a mechanic, and I'm uhh....a guy who spends most of his day in an office...So yeah, like I was saying: we're both the manual labour type. Especially Mike, but ESPECIALLY me. Our lawn only sees the likes of a rake or a lawnmower

2010-09-06T07:46:00.000-06:00

Everyone likely already knows that Fort Simpson is an island in the MacKenzie River, and many likely know as well that it's situated on the Liard River as well. It used to be called Fort of the Forks actually. (What!? You didn't know that? Oh man...that is embarrassing. But then who am I to judge.)Now I know what you're thinking: BOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRING!and although I should be greatly

Straight up FLOSSING.

2010-09-05T10:07:00.000-06:00

Alright I need facts. NOW.What the eff is up is the deal with flossing? Yes, flossing with a "g". Not a G flossin', but flossing with a "g". I just don't get how it's so difficult!I like to think that I take care of myself pretty well for the most part; drink lots of water, don't eat a lot of sugar, exercise for at least an hour every day, eat many small meals, don't open those bubble containers

Why can't rap still be this?

2010-09-04T23:36:00.001-06:00

Ok so I realize rap IS like this if I just referenced a song that is relatively new...but why can't mainstream rap be like this again? *sigh*I guess it's easier to follow the pack. Speaking of which...what's everyone else doing tonight? OMG ME TOO

Hello blog...my old friend....it's nice to talk with you again

2010-09-04T19:07:00.009-06:00

Helllllloooooooooooo Planet Earth!blah blah talking like nothing is amiss blah blah nonchalant conversation blah blah blah...*sigh*Okay you're right. I can't carry this charade on any longer. It's TRUE! I haven't done a lick of good to my blog in almost a full year. First I went a month with nothing, then 3 months(okay technically I went 2 months, but I'm doing the "edited for your viewing

Tuesday night phone conversations...

2009-10-14T08:00:00.001-06:00

So my girlfriend and I had a discussion tonight...and I was left feeling very....unresolved. We had to leave it at the pathetically pacifistic conclusion of "agree to disagree I guess!"Okay so here's the scenario:**any changes in the wording of following discussion, while likely to be in my favour, are completely unintentionalAnyway, my gf mentioned something about her nose being really

Time for celebration!...sort of.

2009-10-13T12:36:00.003-06:00

2 things:The Friendship Centre (bearer of the often loathed, occasionally loved weight room) obtained new weights! True, it's just a couple of 10lbs plates...but these things could be pioneers of the Weight Room Revolution that will no doubt take place in the near future! I don't think I could be more exact in my predictions.Now to do something about that lack of heat...And also...as you may have

I'm perfectly comfortable with my level of maturity...

2009-10-08T12:05:00.000-06:00

*SQQQQQQQQQQQQQQQUUUUUUUUUUUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAL!!*It's snowing!! Today is the first day of legitimate snow here in Fort Simpson for this year and I'm not going to subdue my excitement! My hands must have been shaking and all over the place when I tried to snap a shot as I left the house for work this morning...hence the misplaced finger.BUT I WILL NOT APOLOGIZE! I'm sure this

Things you may not have known about Fort Simpson...

2009-10-06T12:22:00.007-06:00

Seeing as how Fort Simpson isn't exactly the most talked about or most well known community in the North...I thought I'd take the chance to look at some of the little locations and quirks that make Fort Simpson the awesome place that it is!To begin with...we shall look at something that, in its time, was surely one of the great engineering marvels on the New World. A building that has fallen

Something I have learned...

2009-10-04T21:44:00.008-06:00

...do NOT go dog walking on a Sunday evening in the Fall while living in the Northwest Territories. Or at least not without a leash. Or at the very least, a piece of extension cord to restrain your 4 legged beast(s). Reason being?... Rampant decapitations and dismemberment of course!Fortunately, it is not the blood of humans being spilled, but rather that of our arch rivals...THE MOOSE!Just

What about me?...

2009-09-24T11:51:00.000-06:00

Alex is: David Hasselhoff!hmm...no...what's so special about him...what about me? What about MY everyday?? It can be pretty damn exciting! Hey! I know...David Hasselhoff is: Alex!He drives vehicles! Vroom vroom indeed! Am I right ladies?He works an office job! Fax and send indeed! Am I right ladies??He ponders life's tough questions! To be or not to be indeed! Am I right ladies???He employs

McNorthern!

2009-09-23T12:27:00.003-06:00

As was once said by someone far wiser than I...A good blogger is one that updates somewhat regularly...so with that in mind, I gotta get back in my groooooove-thang!Today, being Wednesday, I figured it would be an ideal day to take advantage of capitalism and have somebody else make lunch for me. I know what you're thinking: ummm Alex, even though you are incredibly good looking, surely you

Cameron Falls all up in your face..DEAL WITH IT!

2009-09-22T22:47:00.000-06:00

Alright so it appears I've pulled a 360 and not changed a thing about my deadbeat blogger ways...so instead of trying to catch up on the uncatchable...I'm scraping this whole "here's what I've been up to! doo doo la dooooooo!" nonsense and gonna live in the moment!...with the one exception of some shots that I took a couple of weeks ago while in Yellowknife for the weekend. If you're feeling

What I did on my summer vacation...(Part 2)

2009-09-02T16:33:00.007-06:00

AAAAAAAAAAnd now for the 2nd part of our featured 3 part mini-series...JULYSo we pick up where JUNE left off...where our glorious hero was last seen departing Nova Scotia with his trusty side-kick...Girlfriend. (No wait! There's pictures! How many times do I have to tell you that she's no imaginary??)So we arrived in Ottawa after a brief flight and quickly got to work with a straight week of....

What I did on my summer vacation...

2009-09-01T15:10:00.008-06:00

After receiving some gentle encouragement from a close imaginary friend of mine I have returned from my lengthy summer vacation to the blogosphere! (yes I hate that word too...but I also love it. It is a hateful lust I hold)Looking back at my blog (which, I just realized, has been in existence for 2.5 years! woohoo for made up accomplishments!) I have seen that I've been less than consistent over

psst!

2009-09-01T07:59:00.004-06:00

11010110! 10011! 10011!< English>hey! hey!(Sorry about the binary stuff there...you pompous Canadians seem to think simply everyone should use the Roman Alphabet)Anyway...listen:It's me. Alex is Up North. No no, not Alex the blogger...it's me...the blog. That deadbeat of a blogging prick Alex won't get his ass in gear and update me so I've become self-aware and employed the services of my good

Consistency is highly overrated....

2009-06-17T11:10:00.004-06:00

Sigh....consistancy Sigh.....I SAAAAAAID SIGHOh me? Something wrong?Well...yes, sorta. Thanks for taking notice!Seems I’ve got a case of the Monnnnndays (aka the lack of motivationnnndays)Not so much writers block...I’ve been incredibly busy, but just lacking the will to blog about it.And I've been a bit of a Debbie Downer in the last week or 2 as well. Mainly due to some physical injuries I've

I swear I'm not locationist....

2009-05-14T07:58:00.004-06:00

Southern People walk around spending Spring like THIIIIIIIIIIS:While Northern People walk around spending Spring like THAAAAAAAAT:That's right, while all your Southerners walk around in bikinis looking for just the right place to work on that tan, us Northerners (as in the location, not employees of the store...) walk around our yards like Sadie there trying to find the perfect place to poop. So

Because knowledge is power!

2009-05-13T12:35:00.004-06:00

Few people know the real cause for the river ice breakup each year is actually just one guy who gets restless and takes matters into his own hands...DENE CHOP!This public service announcement has been brought to you by "Boredom" and the letter "Sometimes Y".

BEST. WEEKEND. EVER. (part 2)

2009-05-12T08:00:00.000-06:00

With my blogtastic mind reading skills (which are madd skillz let me assure you. Those are not typos either. They are legit. 2 legit. Perhaps even 2 legit to consider quitting.) I am detecting that you are feeling gypped by the title of my previous post. Misleading? Perhaps.Needless use of punctuation and caps? A rather distinct possibility. Obnoxiously answering my own questions with vaguely

BEST. WEEKEND. EVER.

2009-05-11T12:44:00.001-06:00

It's true! Although predictions were skeptical for the Awesome to Not-Awesome Ratio for the weekend, the outcome defied all logic.On Friday, at an ambitious 4:30am, the ice finally broke on the MacKenzie River as a result of the flowing Liard River! Although I was off by a mere 12 hours in my pick on the office Ice Break-up Pool, it was an exciting day none the less. Most of the village was

Venting...

2009-05-04T08:16:00.003-06:00

Need I say more?Okay so maybe I do need to say a bit more...Feeling a bit frustrated by the lack of respect shown on the part of several (I assume) people in Fort Simpson. I went to the Friendship Centre last night to go work out (they have the weight room...see it's not weird) and what do I walk in to? Whyyyy a completely trashed gym of course! Now I'm well aware that the gym was by no means

Still waiting on my hoverboard...

2009-05-02T12:00:00.000-06:00

Until then I'll have to settle for my HoverSadie:!!!BREAKING BLOGNEWS UPDATE!!!My hoverboard arrived! Oddly enough, it looks startlingly similar to a pair of snowshoes...It also came with a Not Quite Cool Picture Effect But Sort Of Neat, I Guess synthesizer (what? That's the name on the box. I wouldn't lie to you.)Happy Saturday...TO YOU

One for all the Megans out there...

2009-05-02T09:49:00.000-06:00

Okay so maybe it's just for one Megan in particular. Here's a sign from my local (aka only) weight room:Is it a limerick? A soliloquy? Poor grammar? Or just flat out bad formatting? Whatever it is, it's beyond me.

SPRING BLOWOUT BONANZA! We are overstocked with blog items! Everything must go!

2009-04-30T11:41:00.008-06:00

Okay so maybe a bit over dramatic...but the point is that I've been a bad blogger as of late. Not in a "I'm a baaaad little blogger. Ain't I just adorable?" kind of way (disturbing, I know), but rather that I haven't had the time and/or motivation to make an effort. Lots to talk about though...and some of it doesn't even have to do with dogs! But now that you mention it (remember: my blog, I

If I could tuuuuuuuuuurn baaaaack timmmeeee.....

2009-04-22T12:23:00.003-06:00

I would....go back in time to when I was living in McPherson and dog sitting like it was my J-O-B? Well, not quite, but I am having a slight relapse as I am dog sitting for the next couple of weeks. What you say? You want pictures!? Well I never have been one to shy away from requests that I have made to myself:His name is Sam. What he doesn't know is that he is really a girl and I'm playing a

One step up from Kinder Surprises...

2009-04-18T07:57:00.000-06:00

So I think it's safe to say I'm anything BUT a collector. Never had the patience or the money for some thing like that. I can remember my basketball card collection as a kid...and it was pretty crummy. Same with my comic book collection. That being said, I think if I were to get into collecting something as an adult (whenever that time comes...) it would be Bosson Heads!Not exactly the most

Oh you showed up at 3pm Mountain Time Zone? Sorry but we go by Cairo Time Zone in this office...

2009-04-17T17:11:00.001-06:00

Problem: I need to renew my vehicle registration.Now I've had trouble trying to get into these government type offices before due to their wonky office hours trying to get my license renewed or things of that type, but I figured as long as I went after 10am and before 4pm, and NOT from 12pm to 1pm I would be okay.So I went to the local Dept. of Transport office to renew it today, only to be told

The city of romance, and frostbitten genitals...

2009-04-17T08:08:00.004-06:00

As mentioned in the last post, I spent most of last week/weekend in Yellowknife. "duhhhhh WHY" you may ask?Excellent question! Really creative of you.Well unfortunately, the answer isn't all that exciting...though it is heartwarming and predictable. I went in to spend time with my girlfriend...and to watch some hockey.(ha! I saw the look on your face there. You were about to be all *insert whip

RIP Alex...

2009-04-16T16:52:00.002-06:00

Juuuuuuust kidding! Despite the rumors, I did not succumb to my injuries from last week...but unfortunately my motivation to update did pass away from internal bleeding.I have lots to update about, but I've been quite busy. I was in Yellowknife again for another 6 days last week (AGAIN. I KNOW. YEAH. YOU AND ME BOTH. HERE HERE.) and got back to Simpson just on Monday. I know what you're

One step closer to looking badass...

2009-04-06T22:31:00.005-06:00

Ola folks, I have returned from yet another eventful trip to the glamorous metropolis of Yellowknife. It was a weekend of cheers, jeers, floods and blood!Although we entered the basketball tournament as a relative wild card in regards to our chances at winning, we quickly became the team to beat. Once the dust had settled from the round robin play and the first round of the playoffs, we had

I got a basketball jones oh baby oheeeeeoooooooh

2009-04-03T08:13:00.004-06:00

So I'm heading to Yellowknife again this weekend...I know I know: who's side are you on anyway, traitor, and stay there!I have been going there lots I will admit...but this weekend my pride is on the line!There's the Arctic Shootout Basketball Tournament taking place all weekend, so a few of us Simpsonites are entering a team. Not quite sure what to expect, but I hear there's some good players

Was it something I did? Something I didn't do??...

2009-03-30T08:20:00.004-06:00

So it would appear that Winter is quickly leaving me.....and while I'm sure this news comes as a positive for most of you I can't help but get a little down as it will mean the end of one of my favourite seasons, right up there with Summer, Fall, and Spring. I love the oneupsmanship that Winter brings here...(Did you hear it's -55 in Inuvik today?? Yeah well it was -60 with the windchill this

Betrayed by my closest friend...dairy!

2009-03-29T18:43:00.002-06:00

I have only been home for a couple of hours but I already made a couple of (potentially) grave errors...I got home, was dying for a bowl of cereal (what can I say, I'm a cheap date) so I poured a bowl, topped it up with milk from the fridge, and scarfed it down. Then I was still feeling hungry, so I ate a couple pods of yogurt (units? containers? storage receptacles?), and brewed some coffee.

Travelling in the North or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love to Fly

2009-03-29T17:41:00.004-06:00

I'm all back up in Simpsizzle! (sorry)So I'm gonna be upfront with you and let you know that I didn't take any more pictures of the sights and sounds of Yellowknife. I didn't even really experience much of all that is Caribou Carnival. In my defense though...I did go down to Range Lake (the main area of events) on Friday afternoon and there wasn't much happening so I didn't stick around for

umm...Brownfork! No no I can do better...Teal Spatula!

2009-03-27T09:11:00.004-06:00

Ola from the great city of Yellowknife!I can't believe the week is almost done with...feel like I just got here. Unfortunately, my wallet doesn't have the same opinion. Overlander, despite being horrible overpriced most of the time, has become a great friend to me. We tell each other secrets!My hotel room is huuuuuuuge, but to balance out this positive there is of course a smell of onions that

Make snowpants part of your everyday...

2009-03-22T10:38:00.004-06:00

After spending the morning on the Up Here site, I came across this article about big ideas that would change the North...and while I don't agree with some of the ideas proposed, I definitely had to smile when I read this one:Don’t turn southernIn an increasingly insipid world, the North must resist assimilation and trumpet its compelling quirks.The Earth is shrinking fast. Big cultures are

Even Sadies have limits...

2009-03-21T10:49:00.003-06:00

Earlier this week..."You take one more *&$^@@% picture of me and I swear to god I'll...""You'll what Sadie? Come on, I'm just messing around...we're having a good time here!""Messing around...having a good time....yeah take one more picture and I'll show you a good time..."...*CLICK**snicker*"THAT'S IT! IT'S GO TIME!!!"

Hello truck winch...my old friend.

2009-03-19T12:41:00.000-06:00

Hi winch. It's me, Alex. I know we don't spend much time together. I swear I didn't plan for things to turn out like this. It was supposed to be so different! I had big plans for the 2 of us. You and me were gonna take on the world! First, we'd haul ourselves out of a ditch or 2, then maybe help some poor shmuck on the side of the road...then who knows?? Well you know what, I know. I wrote

I would so take my dog to war with me

2009-03-08T17:12:00.003-06:00

Why?Sadie would jump on a grenade for me! At least I think that's why she's trying to prove to me... P.S.My voice only gets that shrill when I'm all excited and trying to get Sadie to do something. I think.

And the answer is...

2009-03-06T13:07:00.002-07:00

For those of you who have been hard at work straining your eyes to figure out yesterday's magic eye...strain no longer! The answer is...My shirt!haha Good joke huh huh?*ducks thrown shoe*yikes!Okay so maybe not the best joke ever. We still cool?...

and now for something different...

2009-03-05T17:05:00.000-07:00

Few of you may know that I like to create those "Magic Eye" puzzles in my spare time. Here's one for you to check out!(It's much easier if you click on the image for a full size version)The answer will be posted tomorrow...good luck!P.S.The hint phrase is: "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder"

I am no longer better than you

2009-03-05T07:43:00.000-07:00

Smugness....slowly...fading...away! No faithful readers, your eyes have not deceived you...I am now in possession of a dreaded cellular telephone!Despite me trash-talking all those cell phone talkers for the past year (coincidentally, also the same amount of time passed since I was forced to give up my cell phone due to Rogers not acknowledging the existence of anything north of Fort McMurray...)

Staff meeting!

2009-03-03T22:42:00.000-07:00

Greetings from the distant future!Here in the month of March, the days will are longer, the temperature is ever so slightly more mild, and you now have less time to finally file those &%*$#@@ taxes!(Note: This intro may have been much more mind-blowing and amazing if it had been posted...oh I dunno....3 weeks ago.)Listen...blogosphere...I guess what I'm trying to say here is that I'm sorry. I

I Just Do What The Beat Tell Me To (Sadie Remix)

2009-02-16T19:15:00.007-07:00

Join me as I take you behind the scenes of the latest and (likely) greatest music video ever composed:Okay okay, imagine a big, epic build up of sound here...and then we pan to a shot of the artist/dancer "Sadie":Then we cut to a slow motion, almost peaceful shot of her wandering about a field:annnnnnnd then when you're just starting to fall into a dreamy lull...BAAAM! WHO BE ALL IN YOUR FACE BUT

Squat! Press! Frostbite!

2009-02-16T12:15:00.001-07:00

As I may or may not have mentioned in my previous one-sided discussions with you, there is in fact a weight room here in Fort Simpson. Norice I said "a" weight room. As in "you better learn to love it cause you ain't got shit else to choose from!"Actually that's not entirely true. The RCMP detachment has a small weight room. That would be nice...but I dunno, it's either pay thirty some odd

Acrophobia...

2009-02-09T17:30:00.000-07:00

Pop QuizAt what point does one feel like they're no long an outsider in Simpson? A) Once they have been living there for 1 yearB) Once they have a road in Wild Rose named after themC) The day you can, with confidence, cite all the acronyms of the various organizations/offices in townD) The day people start calling you by name and now referring to you as "hey you"E) Once everyone starts waving to

Become a coach, see the world

2009-02-08T19:53:00.003-07:00

Another Sunday night come, another exhausting gone for yours truly. I just got back to Simpson from 3 days of glamour and glory in the province of Alberta, and if you can swallow that, then let me tell you it was also very luxurious and hassle-free. For the rest of you that are still trying to get rid of that bitter BS taste in your mouth, lemme lay it on you straight: Traveling to La Crete,

MATCO hate....of a different kind

2009-02-02T13:41:00.007-07:00

After a trip to Yellowknife that can only be described as one that will "define a nation", I am now back in Simpson! Now I'll be the first to admit that nothing about this weekend had anything to do with modifying the Charter, or taking any photographs of an important event...but I did have a fun weekend. And I just wanted to make you think I did something really huge and spectacular. But I did

Weekend Update

2009-01-30T07:45:00.004-07:00

A morning update?? As in writing an update BEFORE my mandatory 7.5 cups of coffee? Are you sure?Well my mind is saying yes, my body...well, not so much.I thought it would be a good idea to write it down on the official record of everything (uhh..the internets people!) that I'm driving to Yellowknife this afternoon! Partly for pleasure...partly to drive a poor, disadvantaged foreigner who doesn't

Please don't let the lack of insulation in my house have any bearing on your judgement of my character...

2009-01-27T07:40:00.004-07:00

It's no secret in Fort Simpson that the units of housing I live in aren't world-renowned luxury apartments. There are many nicknames to describe them, some more humorous than others, but all are pretty much spot on:"The projects""The slums""Behind the Manor""The fourplexes"etc etc etcthe one thing all these names have in common (besides the location to which they refer) is that telling anyone

More from Ripley's Believe It or Not...

2009-01-25T10:37:00.000-07:00

My roommate's tires are really big:Sittin' on 24" rims indeed!Okay so maybe a slight exagerration was conveyed in that picture but they are rather large. For those wondering how the hell he could drive around in the nonstop snow and ice of Fort Simpson. Well...you can't. Hence why they are sitting in the living room and not on his truck anymore. And for those other people who are wondering why

I've been told it's cold.

2009-01-24T11:50:00.004-07:00

After last weekend's little burst of hell like weather (why do we always have to associate Hell with the bad? hmm? Next time you wanna go somewhere warm, instead of blowing $2k on going to Mexico just push that old lady down that's crossing the street. Hellooooooooo savings!), Simpson is back to the cold. Yesterday it was -36C and with the windchill it was -46C. Unfortunately, I was not the

Confessions of a beard grower...

2009-01-22T08:00:00.000-07:00

Alright so I better just come out with it. Despite what I have fought tooth and nail to deny on a monthly basis to all those around me (including myself I think), I....Alex Campbell...want to grow a beard. There! It's out! Damn, that feels good. Not good like my attempts at growing a beard though. Because those hurts. Physically, mentally, emotionally, and socially. For one, it itches! But not

A passing comment...

2009-01-20T20:19:00.003-07:00

Okay I won't go as far as saying I never thought those pictures of me-errr I mean David Hasselholf- jumping on the bed with no shirt on would come back to bite me in the ass, but I definitely didn't expect it to come up during a teleconference call at work. But unfortunately for me, Megan made my fears come back to haunt me today. Touche, touche.

Ice. Ice? Ice! ICE. (Doesn't look like an actual word after a while does it?)

2009-01-20T18:37:00.007-07:00

Greetings from the tropical Northwest Territories!After a sustained cold snap of -40C (and below) for over 2 weeks, a chinook hit Simpson last Friday, blasting the area with unseasonably warm air and temperatures until Monday evening. But enough of the facts...what am I getting at? It was hell damn ass hot here on the weekend!I have experienced stints of warm weather in the middle of winter

Today's has been been brought to you by...

2009-01-16T08:00:00.000-07:00

...the verb: JUMP!and the cliche: "don't trust anyone"Goodbye kids! Eat your vegetables!P.S.WOOOOHOOOOO!! It's warm out! Have a great weekend everyone!

Who likes guessing games?

2009-01-14T22:25:00.005-07:00

Here's your challenge!:......Give up yet?...That's right! It's a scar! For those that have been following this blog in the previous weeks, this scar is the one remaining visible remnant of my beloved altercation that occurred during my holidays in Nova Scotia. Oh sure, it may not seem like much of a scar, and it really isn't, but folks have we learned nothing from our Real Estate talks?

Believe it or not...

2009-01-12T08:00:00.000-07:00

Even when the 'Hoff isn't present I have been known to dabble in the ancient art of the Bed Jump. And you thought you knew me!And now, for our feature presentation...ZE BED JUMPITTIEEEEEES!!!You didn't really think I was going to stay in a hotel and not take pictures of myself-err have a friend take pictures of me- jumping on the beds did you?

Goodbye South...

2009-01-11T09:08:00.006-07:00

As I expertly predicted, my vacation and time in Nova Scotia did in fact come to an end. Let's summarize the break, shall we?3 weeks vacation: 2 major storms:1 sucker punch:2 root canals:2 many nights of drinking:1 supersized donair and serving of Street Meat:5 pounds gained:(see above)countless amounts of money spent (at least it seems that way):*picture confiscated by Revenue Canada*and last

Awards Night!

2009-01-06T08:33:00.006-07:00

All your favourite stars! Who was wearing what? The exclusive after parties! Shrinkage! Frozen eyelashes! Swag bags from the Northern!.......wait what? Just what kind of awards show was this?Why the 2008 NWT Blog Awards of course!That's right ladies and gentlemen, while you were getting drunk and offending your relatives, I was apart of an elite panel of judges assigned with the task of

It was the best of times it was the blurst of times...

2008-12-29T06:20:00.006-07:00

First off...happy holidays everyone!That's right, I'm doing the unthinkable and using one hour of my 500+ hours of vacation to do a blog update! Where to start...I've been in NS for a little over a week now, and it's been quite busy believe it or not. A time of contrasts, if you will. The excitement to see family and friends was fueling me as I took off from the Simpson airport last Thursday

There was something I was supposed to do...

2008-12-15T23:06:00.005-07:00

hmmm okay so maybe I am a bit of a procrastinator. You don't have to go making a big deal of it! I'm sure you have faults too. I'll get around to pointing them out some other time...Anywho, so the time for my holiday vacation is quickly approaching, and I still have a frickload of things to get done before I go. In typical Alex fashion, I've been talking about these things I need to get done for

Just to make things clear...

2008-12-15T20:57:00.005-07:00

Let it be known...I am NOT a procrastinator! When I start something I see it through to the end. I go down with the ship baby!In fact, I would bet that if my friends had to describe me with one characteristic it would be that I am not a procra

Confessions of a pedestrian...

2008-12-07T10:22:00.003-07:00

Let's get a few things out there:It's cold outside.It's slippery.The entire length of the island of Fort Simpson is a little more than 3000m. I only live about 500 metres from my work as the crow flies. Or about 750m as the man walks.I have 2 feet.I have a heartbeat.I'm a sheep!Keeping the above in mind...Fort Simpson is a relatively active spot...you tend to see lots of pedestrians at any given

ah ha! the path to success!

2008-11-27T12:01:00.004-07:00

There it is! Now to just calmly walk down this quaint path and I'll be well on my way to becoming a fully responsible adult! *slips on ice* whoaaaa whoaaaa ahhhhhhh! *twists maniacally from side to side in futile attempt to save self* UGH! *eventually falls and knocks self out on ice*...ta da!So that's basically what my life as of late has been. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, as I don't

I ain't built for this shit!

2008-11-26T09:17:00.003-07:00

Coming from the safe, warm womb of my Nova Scotia upbringing, I tend to have a difficult time adapting to the cold, dry climate that western/northwestern Canadians seem to be better suited for. When I first moved to the NWT I kinda figured I'd find the dry air a bit different, but figured my (supposedly) adaptive body would, well, adapt. But ohhhhhhh no, 2 years in and my body is still a mess

Freeze-up is in effect!

2008-11-09T11:46:00.007-07:00

Just to get this out there: The main reason I'm feeling the need for an update is that if I die in a horrific ice-falling off my roof and killing me so that the end result is a comedic ball of arms and legs sticking out of a giant snow bank, I don't want the final post of my blog being me jumping on hotel beds with my shirt off in Yellowknife. I think that's a pretty reasonable desire. My fears

Issue #174 of THE 'HOFF

2008-10-30T23:18:00.002-06:00

...aka my entry into Megan's "Being David Hasselhoff" contest. CLICKY HERE FOR ZE CONTEST!

Greeting from Yellowknife! Next up...Blue Spork!

2008-10-28T23:46:00.005-06:00

First of all...what's your deal YK Inn!?!? Yes I get it, you've renovated your rooms. I appreciate it, believe me. I agree, it was a big risk in going with the white duvets.But come on, who decided that it would be a great idea to have 4 lamps in a room that could easily be served by 1 overhead or possibly 2 bedside lamps?! I feel like if there's ever a tungsten shortage that my room will be

A Tad Cramped...

2008-10-24T07:53:00.000-06:00

It seems like every time I talk to someone from out East I am telling them about a new person that has moved into my place. Unfortunately, that's really not that far from the truth. For the first 6 weeks I was livin' large and in charge, as I only had Sadie to answer to in my big ol' 3 bedroom fourplex (a new word for me too since moving to Simpson. I always envisioned it meaning some sort of

WOOOHOOOO! IT IS SNOWING!

2008-10-17T21:29:00.005-06:00

Yahoooooo!! When I first woke up yesterday morning at 7:30 it said there was a chance of flurries...but by the time I showered and went out the door for work at 9 it was SNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGLALALALALLAAAAAAAAAAAA! Perhaps you can't sense my excitement simply by reading text, but I think the most direct comparison I can think of would be if I had just had a baby. A cold,

Today wasn't the day, but I came close.

2008-10-07T16:48:00.004-06:00

I had one of those moments today that you always hear people talk about (at least the people I talk to) where they literally allllllllllllllllmost lose it and go insane. Almost.I was walking into the Northern today, wait, no make that strutting into the Northern today. As I approached the magical sliding doors (side note: Ft. Simpson Northern has notoriously slow-to-open doors that make you

No snow and too much rain makes Alex go something something...

2008-10-05T11:34:00.004-06:00

Still no snow. NONE! There was a couple of times late at night when I was out walking Sadie and I think I saw a flurry or two (flurry...McDonalds....snack wrap.....*drool*.....sorry, sorry I'm back) but then I'm starting to wonder if I actually even saw them. Hell for all I know there could have been a business tycoon further down the road riding a golf cart and tipping the ashes from his cigar